People love weddings, and anyone who knows you’re getting married probably expects an invite. Unfortunately, you can’t invite everyone, and it’s hard to know sometimes who to cut from your wedding guest list, especially when you want to keep from offending anyone. While these are all good tips, remember always that this is your big day and you need to make decisions that work best for you and your future spouse.
At some point though, to ease the stress of planning your wedding, you have to draw a line. And it’s likely to start with the wedding guest list. Here are five people who won’t make the cut.
1. Work Colleagues
For the overwhelming majority, work colleagues are people you only see every day because of a current situation: work. A good rule of thumb for coworkers is the “but for” test: But for this job, would you socialize with these people? If the answer is no, there’s no need to invite them.
Coworkers you regularly socialize with outside of work are a different exception. But if you have no reason to talk coworkers except for work-related matters, there’s no social obligation to invite coworkers. Regardless of the relationship, if you’re really unsure or don’t want to make it awkward to invite some coworkers but not others, it’s okay to leave everyone off the list.
Children count in the overall total. Although children reduce food and bar bill, they still take up a space when booking your venue, and that space adds up quickly. Unless they’re sons and daughters of close family members or those in the bridal party, it’s fair to exclude any children under 18 years old.
‘Adults only’ is a common wedding practice that many people implement in their wedding. It’s also an easy way to save some money in the total budget. Make exceptions for family, but overall, not every guest can bring their kids to the reception. Don’t feel obligated to invite every guest’s child. Many of your guests would appreciate and enjoy an evening out!
3. Distant Relatives
Levels of closeness between relatives varies between families. The groom may be closer to his second cousins and invite them over first cousins, while the bride is close with her first cousins only. If you have relatives you haven’t talked to in a few years or family members you only see at annual social functions, they’ll understand the lack of invite.
If you’re not sure what certain family members are doing in their lives, it’s not necessary to invite them to the wedding. Blood relationships don’t translate to automatic invitations, especially for family members you barely know.
4. Anyone You Haven’t Spoken with This Past Year
When putting your wedding guest list together, think about the last time you talked to each of these guests. Thinking about whether you know what said guest does for a living or any particular facts about their life is a good gauge for determining whether they should be invited or not.
If it’s someone you only catch up with intermittently or you can’t remember when you last had a real chat with this person, there’s no need to send an invitation. The connection just isn’t strong enough to give them a spot on the list.
5. Unnecessary Plus Ones
Not everybody will be allowed to bring a plus one. For any guests miffed at the distinction, let them know they won’t be the only single guest there. Plenty of other single people will be there to mingle with, too. It’s okay to be selective about who can bring a plus one.
It doesn’t make much sense for a guest without a significant other to bring someone just to talk to. The best way to cut a guest list is to start with people you don’t know very well. If your guests don’t have someone special to bring, it’s not worth the additional invitation.